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You’re Too Smart for This

ISBN: 9781402205989

By: Michael Ball

Published: 03/31/2006

Your first job isn't all it's cracked up to be…

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Description

Your first job isn't all it's cracked up to be . . . You just spent $100,000 on a college degree to make photocopies. And your manager probably isn’t even happy with them.

Life at the entry level isn't about what school you graduated from, or even who you know. It’s actually about paying dues and brownnosing and keeping your foot out of your mouth during meetings.

You're Too Smart For This explains everything your college professors didn't:

· Understand how college has no application to reality, or anybody living in it.
· Come to terms with doing gruntwork and smiling while being yelled at.
· Get straight with operating on a team - putting personal interests second, for once.
· Negotiate office politics, and recognize when to keep quiet (e.g., "the daytime").
· Earn the right promotion or transfer, instead of quitting and being poor again.
· Locate a balanced work life, not based on social sacrifice and being hostile.

You're Too Smart For This will help you get the hang of the working life soon enough. And even have some fun with it. Especially at happy hour.

About the Author

Michael Ball is the founder and CEO of Career Freshman Co., the entry level training authority to the Fortune 1000. A former Big Four consultant and Silicon Valley dot-comer, Ball saw too many smart college recruits doing dumb things—besides their jobs—and devoted his own career to making gruntwork hurt less. Michael holds a degree in psychology and business from UCLA, and lives in Los Angeles.

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Table of Contents

Introduction: What, You Actually Bought That?
- Lie no. 1: You’re Going to Love Your First Couple of Jobs

Chapter 1: School Lied to You First
- Lie no. 2: College Taught You How to Function Off-Campus
- Lie no. 3: You’re Too Young for an Identity Crisis
- Lie no. 4: Work Is Going to Challenge You Like Your Classes Did
- Lie no. 5: You Can Expect Similar Performance Feedback

Chapter 2: You’re Too Smart for This
- Lie no. 6: Your College Degree Actually Means Something
- Lie no. 7: If You Got Hired, It Means They Trust You
- Lie no. 8: You’ll Be Doing the Job That the Company Described
- Lie no. 9: You’re Too Smart for This
- Lie no. 10: Intelligence Makes Up for Experience
- Lie no. 11: You Can at Least Bitch about Your Gruntwork
- Lie no. 12: Do Whatever Is Asked of You

Chapter 3: Misconceptions about Managers, Coworkers, and Others Who Regularly Piss You Off
- Lie no. 13: You Don’t Have to Manage Your Manager
- Lie no. 14: Your Boss Knows How Your Projects Are Going
- Lie no. 15: Managers Just Love Surprises
- Lie no. 16: It’s More Important to Be Smart Than to Be Liked
- Lie no. 17: Individual Performance Comes Before Teamwork
- Lie no. 18: Go Ahead, Flaunt Your Success
- Lie no. 19: You Can Handle It Without a Mentor
- Lie no. 20: Your Mentor Is Your New Best Friend
- Lie no. 21: Don’t Disturb the Veterans in the Office
- Lie no. 22: Networks Are for More Established Professionals

Chapter 4: The Daily Grunt
- Lie no. 23: You Can Still Turn in a “B” Assignment
- Lie no. 24: If You’re Good, You Shouldn’t Make Mistakes
- Lie no. 25: Try to Downplay Your Screw-Ups
- Lie no. 26: People Remember What They Said, Asked, or Promised
- Lie no. 27: Colleagues Should Know How Long Things Take You
- Lie no. 28: If You Don’t Know, Guess
- Lie no. 29: You Can Lie, Cheat, and Steal Like in College
- Lie no. 30: You Still Need a Professor to Teach You
- Lie no. 31: No Need to Learn the Business If You Do Your Job Well
- Lie no. 32: Reading and Classes Were Only for School

Chapter 5: Branding Your Grunt
- Lie no. 33: You’re One-of-a-Kind to the Company
- Lie no. 34: Just Blend in with the Crowd
- Lie no. 35: Try to Do Everything Well
- Lie no. 36: People Already Know What You Can Do for Them
- Lie no. 37: You’ll Get Remembered Just by Being There
- Lie no. 38: Be Known for Many Things
- Lie no. 39: Your Brand Can Stand on Its Own
 - Lie no. 40: Brands Take Care of Themselves

Chapter 6: Lies, Damn Lies, and Office Politics
- Lie no. 41: The Company Works How It Says It Does
- Lie no. 42: Feel Free to Voice Your Concern
- Lie no. 43: You Can Play Politics Once You Understand Them
- Lie no. 44: To Get What You Want, Do What You Have To
- Lie no. 45: Downtime Is Your Own Time
- Lie no. 46: You’ve Got the Best Ideas
- Lie no. 47: Good Ideas Sell Themselves
- Lie no. 48: Politics Don’t Affect Good Ideas
- Lie no. 49: Ideas Are as Good When Coming from You
- Lie no. 50: You Can Sleep with Your Coworkers

Chapter 7: It’s Up or Out
- Lie no. 51: Promotions Are Based on Hard Work
- Lie no. 52: Colleagues Don’t Influence Promotions
- Lie no. 53: You’ll Get Promoted During a Bad Stretch
- Lie no. 54: The Job Has to Exist for You to Get It
- Lie no. 55: Transfers Aren’t as Good as Promotions
- Lie no. 56: Politically, Transfers Are No Problem
- Lie no. 57: Up Is the Only Way Out

Chapter 8: Finding Your Work - Lie Balance
- Lie no. 58: The Company Cares about Your Outside Life
- Lie no. 59: You Have to Work Harder at the Beginning
- Lie no. 60: More Hours, More Success
- Lie no. 61: Burnout Only Happens to Older Workers
- Lie no. 62: The Job Should Dictate Your Priorities
- Lie no. 63: No Time for Balance
- Lie no. 64: You Can’t Say No
- Lie no. 65: Your Love Life Comes Later
- Lie no. 66: You’ll Find “The One” in a Bar
- Lie no. 67: Online Dating Is the Answer
- Lie no. 68: You Can Rest When You’re Dead

Chapter 9: Do What You Love, and You’ll Probably Starve
- Lie no. 69: Most Careers Are Carefully Chosen
- Lie no. 70: People Know Where They’re Going Professionally
- Lie no. 71: Values Generally Guide Work
- Lie no. 72: Jobs Are Often Fulfilling and Enjoyable
- Lie no. 73: Work Is about Money, Not Purpose
- Lie no. 74: Do What You Love, and You’ll Probably Starve
- Lie no. 75: Passions Are Always End-All, Be-All

Chapter 10: The Money Will Make You Happy
- Lie no. 76: The Money Will Make You Happy
- Lie no. 77: Cash Now, Dreams Later
- Lie no. 78: Executives Are Really Important People
- Lie no. 79: Money Says a Lot about You
- Lie no. 80: You Can Have It All
- Lie no. 81: The Safe Move Is a Safe Move
- Lie no. 82: You’ll Wish You Spent More Time at the Office

Chapter 11: Don’t Worry, the Company Will Take Care of You
- Lie no. 83: There’s Still a Ladder to Climb
- Lie no. 84: You’ve Got a Résumé to Worry About
- Lie no. 85: You Only Get One Career
- Lie no. 86: The Company Will Keep You During Lean Times
- Lie no. 87: Getting Laid-Off Is a Big Deal
- Lie no. 88: Put Your Identity into Your Job
- Lie no. 89: Get Close to Your Coworkers
- Lie no. 90: Quit When It Gets Bad

Chapter 12: What’s Wrong with What’s Next
- Lie no. 91: You Should Know What’s Next
- Lie no. 92: Get Excited, Not Stressed
- Lie no. 93: Everything Will Go According to Plan
- Lie no. 94: Trial and Error Is a Bad Thing
- Lie no. 95: Knowing What You Should Do Means Doing It
- Lie no. 96: It’s All Going to Happen Fast
- Lie no. 97: Failure Means You’re Wrong or Not Good Enough
- Lie no. 98: Success Is More Talent Than Hard Work
- Lie no. 99: They’re Behind You All the Way
- Lie no. 100: Irrational Is Impossible

Specs

Format: Paperback

Dimensions
Length: 7 in
Width: 5 in
Weight: 11.00 oz
Page Count: 352 pages

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